Creating a place to speak about things in my heart was a bold step for me for so many reasons. Little did I know that once I hit post that I would have a wave of emotions that would cripple me in a space of fear. The crazy thing about fear is I often forget that it’s not a feeling the feeling is a bi product of something greater.
In a conversation with my Heavenly Father, I was gently reminded of the scripture. 2 Timothy 1:7- For God has not given us the spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.
And I know what you’re thinking “duh Cherie, of course that is the scripture that comes to mind, like who doesn’t know that one!’
And honestly in that moment, this scripture highlighted in my heart in a way it had not before or maybe it had, and I was gently reminded. The enlightenment for me was surrounded around the word spirit…
God’s spirit whispered “Cherie, if fear is a spirit, then why would you keep dealing with it like a feeling? BOOM…
Okay, cause the truth is that I have been here before… setting out to do something in my heart that I know I was led to do and then all of sudden. I care!
Care about what my friends and family may think and if I’m dating about what that man thinks as well. Thoughts start to bombard me in every direction like a firing squad!
What if the words don’t seem to come out right? What if I'm mis understood? What if nobody cares? and what if I overlook a typo or four!!!! I mean I could go on and on.
As I started to really think about it… This spirit tries to be so inconspicuous that some of times I thought I wasn’t in fear I was! See, a spirit can shape shift into many things and before you realize it you are dealing with idols and whew chile you will find yourself in left field of a detour caused by a distraction that started in the intention of walking in purpose. (whew!! catches my breath)
Wait What????
Yes, Fear is a spirit & yes, spirits can shape shift into many things!
I could really get so deep and complex with this, but I’ll try to keep it short and impactful.
Fear: I’ll never be married
Action of the Fear: Not being mindful of your words or thoughts, Not taking care of yourself in preparation for a Husband/wife (weight gain, lack of hygiene), Settling in situation ships that don’t align to your true desires. Not taking a trip or buying house because you think you need to be married to enjoy it,
Root of Fear: Lack of understanding about yourself and the God you serve. Low self-esteem, hurt, Rejection that was never dealt with or unforgiveness.
Shape Shift: Working all the time, Self-Isolation, never shooting your shot, procrastination, unwilling to let anyone in etc.
Idol: Worshiping the idol of yourself- Unwilling to allow the will of God to flow through your life in the way God wrote it instead of how you can control it.
The truth: Sometimes, staying at home and minding my business is sometimes built on FEAR…
What if the real reason you couldn’t lose weight was not because of lack of discipline but the lack of discipline is actually tied to the spirit of fear that sold you the lie of "never being married"... and lie was breed from never healing from moments of rejection or hurt that occurred in your past. Being fired from a job or ghosted by a man/woman that was more broken than you, failing in school or a sport, losing a competition of some sort, or just being afraid to lose altogether (listen, being afraid to lose could as we say… Umm preach all by itself) Rejection shape shifting into Fear that shifts into laziness in every area of our lives …. Say what now?? Umm mm yep! I have been there in a few scenarios in my life.
The spirit is why we often have a hard time describing the grip & the hold it has … (often this can be broken by self-accountability the act of simply talking to yourself and telling yourself the truth)
I could go on and talk about how it shows up financially as well as other ways… and hopefully you can start to identify with how fear can shape shift in our lives to keep us from being consistent and seeing the other side of the temporary defeat.
The Lost conversation:
Fear is not a feeling that you will just wake up and it will go away, it won’t. Fear is defeated through prayer and action, intentional action to be exact.
Being intentional about getting to the root of Fear and the way it has shown up your life, I have discovered has been key to plain ole growing up!
Accept the feeling but also deal with what the issue is that driving it “cause ain't nobody got time to be stuck.”
Get vulnerable with you Father God... Tell him what happened you and how you are hurting? He promises to be close to the broken in spirit. Find you a scripture you can cling to... and watch him show up to deliver you!
Overcoming fear requires work! Which is why you still see people sitting in a corner on the street of the dreams of their heart even when it is right in front of them.
Today, I hit post again like I said yes to the date…
like I agreed to try new food…
like I committed to making sure I’m not only healthy in body but in heart and mind
like leaning into the uncertainty of my faith
like waking up to all things new!
I declare because God hasn't given me the spirit of fear I will live in the intentionally of his purpose for my life. I will do it afraid knowing that he is pleased.
No Worries!! We in this together… I’m tackling things as they show up and thanking God for grace along the way.
We got this!
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